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A few weeks later, she joined him for " a wonderful weekend " in his home state. I'm in like with him — and that's exactly where I want to be. In The Normal Bar, a book I wrote last year with Chrisanna Northrup and James Witte, we reported that 61 percent of female survey respondents who had partners fantasized about someone they had met. For men, the figure was 90 percent. And should they be propositioned by someone they found attractive, 48 percent of the women and 69 percent of the men said they would be tempted to have sex outside the relationship.

Indeed, many surrendered to that lure in actuality: It found that 6 percent to 8 percent of singles age 50 and up were dating more than one person at a time. The same study revealed 11 percent of survey respondents were in a sexual relationship that did not involve cohabitation. What do you have to lose?

Can a casual sexual relationship exact an emotional toll? Some people are out there cruising with the intent of taking advantage of our community, and they are counting on us to feel ashamed. The internet is a playground for anonymity. It is not your fault. You do not have to report it to police. You do not have to tell your friends. The shame felt after being the victim on this type of crime is rough enough. What is the difference between Guilt and Shame? What do we mean by shame?

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What will sex be like? Will you be using protection? Where will the hook-up occur?


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